Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Strange, yet familiar...

I often find myself back in this same place, as if traveling in circles along the same path and as I travel along this same path, I encounter the same disappointments and unmet expectations. It makes perfect sense since I haven't made a change in my path to affect the eventual outcome. Wow...

To make any sort of adjustment may have repercussions that affect not only me, but 5 lives around me. How could I be so selfish to even think of causing an upheaval?

It's this rut I am in, that I constantly find myself in. So disappointed in myself for not achieving goals I have set for myself. I am in a self indulgent pity party of one.

AGH! Gotta get out of this funk...

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Happy 2010!

We're 5 days in and I feel like we are 5 months in! And I am stuck...so many thoughts swimming in my head and I want to put them all down. But I am stuck in a rut. I've tried numerous times over the past few days to blog about so many things, so many thoughts but I can't find the right words. I've been inspired by someone but at the same time humbled. I think it's the humbled part that makes me feel like I am at a loss for words. So now I am just consumed with trying to sort through these thoughts...maybe later or another day...I was hoping that if I just started typing that something would come to me and I could just go off of that. This is probably my third attempt today at this blog and I don't think I am off to a successful start...hahaha...let me collect these thoughts and get back to you!